So Eugene Melnyk picked up today where Bryan Murray left off about Matt Cooke yesterday, saying, among other things

“This guy should be kicked … He doesn’t belong in the league. He belongs somewhere where the goons play. Get him in the Central league. He can be a $60,000-a-year guy playing pick-up hockey there.”


Look, I get their anger. We would be just as angry if, oh I don’t know, Chris Neil had done this to Sidney Crosby. In fact, we were outraged when P.K. Subban cut Jordan Staal with a kick. We were sure it was intentional. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn’t.

But I digress. I present to you now the career stats of two players.

Player A:
0.16 goals/game
0.22 assists/game
1.17 PIM/game
PIM to Pt ratio: 3.05

Player B:
0.12 goals/game
0.15 assists/game
2.55 PIM/game
PIM to Pt ratio: 9.30

Player B’s PIM to Point ratio is over 3 times higher than Player A’s. By almost any rational analysis, Player B would be labeled much more of a “goon” than Player A.

And therein lies the rub. Perhaps the sanctimonious Mr. Melnyk would be well-served to step down off his high horse. You see, Player B is none other than his own Chris Neil, well known headhunter and cheap shot artist (just Google Chris Neil sucker punch and see how many examples there are). Let’s not forget that this angel sucker-punched Cooke from behind, as is his wont. Player A is, of course, Matt Cooke, the goon who Melnyk says should be kicked out of the NHL.

So, Mr. Melnyk, if your words are to have even one ounce of weight in the hockey community, I urge you to immediately release Chris Neal so he can start earning his $60,000 in the CHL