Jack Edwards

“You don’t know” Jack Edwards struck again during Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals last Saturday by suggesting Mike Emrick, tweedle-dee, and tweedle-dum sounded far less excited than HE thought they should’ve during the Bruins’ first offensive onslaught of the series.

For those of you who don’t know, Edwards is the voice of the Boston Bruins on NESN, and he was born with a terrible defect in his hip that jerks his foot violently upward to his mouth with seemingly no warning.

Edwards tweeted the following Saturday:

“Is it just me (it well could be, y’know) or do NBC guys sound a little sad? Can’t imagine they would sound this way if Sid had 2 & Iginla 1.”

Yes, Jack, it is just you.

For a reminder, this is what Doc sounded like a few years ago.

Brad Marchand

Well, might as well get it all out of the way now.

I’m sure Jack Edwards wouldn’t dare say anything about Brad Marchand, even though his hit Saturday night on James Neal was of the same caliber as Matt Cooke’s on Adam McQuaid.

The difference between those plays is that McQuaid saw Cooke coming, turned his back intentionally, and left his feet to make the hit seem worse. While the acting performance was mediocre at best, it got Cooke kicked out of the game.

Marchand gave a cross check to Neal when he didn’t see him coming, and was a dangerous distance from the boards. But we could sit here all day and night arguing about what’s a penalty and what isn’t. So that’s not my point.

It was Marchand’s “holy cats could you make that look any more intentional” slue foot of Sidney Crosby in game two Monday night that really showed his true color.

I can’t wait to see what his next performance will be in game three tonight.

Canes’ new threads

In no way are Carolina’s new uniforms being put on the actual list itself (mostly because I say there is an imaginary “hater list” somewhere, when, in actually there isn’t – it’s nothing you didn’t already assume).

In fact, I like the simplicity – the crispness, if you will – of the Hurricane’s new jerseys

The best part of this piece on NHL.com is the descriptions of the changes below the photo, particularly, “The logo outline was changed from metallic to matte silver finish.” And, my favorite, “Lettering and numbering changed to a clean, round, sans-serif-based font.”

Because, when it comes down to it, there’s nothing fresher than a sans-serif font to clean up a hockey jersey.

Jury’s still out on the Dallas unis. Thoughts?

Beaver Stadium

In other non-playoff musings, talks resurfaced Monday that Beaver Stadium should play host to a hockey game sometime in the near future.

The main story, featured on Penn Live – parent company to the Harrisburg Patriot-News, indicated a variety of options for a potential game. Certainly not the least popular of which was a Penguin/Flyer game.

What a disaster that would be…

Two fan bases that loathe each other, at a hockey game between their two teams, in the biggest drinking college town in the country….Yeah, that will work out swimmingly.

Having seen what that is like just at IUP (the country’s biggest Division II drinking town), I know that would be a bad combination.

How about Penn State/Ohio State? For as much as I’m not a Big Ten Hockey guy, I think it would be a great atmosphere to further promote the Nittany Lions’ up-and-coming program.

Just thinking out loud. But it brings us right to…

Bill O’Brien

The Boston-born head coach of the Penn State football team acknowledged his support for his hometown Bruins before the Eastern Conference Finals began.

Now, admittedly, I’m not a Penn State guy, either…instead, I prefer to masochistically plant myself in front of Pitt games all year. So it’s not too hard for me to put O’Brien on the previously-mentioned fictional hater list.

O’Brien did, however, voice an apology to the State College-based Pens faithful.

Kings/Hawks

Oh, hey, there’s another series going on, too.

Game three of the Western Conference Finals was played last night, with LA beating Chicago, 3-1.

Going into the game, the Kings won 14 in a row at home, and seven in the playoffs. On the road, they were dismal. Nothing like home ice to turn a series around.

Here’s hoping the opposite can occur tonight.

That will do it for this week’s edition. Be sure to check back next week for more. Until then, happy hating!