Humpday Hater Report 6-26-13
So about professional sports being rigged…
How did that work out?
If thereâ€™s one thing we learned from these playoffs, itâ€™s that if you canâ€™t start watching a hockey game until near the end of regulation, thatâ€™s OK. Chances are, youâ€™ll catch the most important parts in the final few minutes.
For that matter, it seemed like the whole season went that way.
But can anyone remember an ending of any game in the modern era being THAT exciting? I mean holy cats – especially considering the consequences. Bravo, hockey, youâ€™ve amazed me yet again.
Doc Emrick talked about the tradition of the handshake after Monday nightâ€™s Game 6 Stanley Cup-clinching victory for Chicago. But another tradition seems just as old: Booing the commissioner. People that donâ€™t watch sports wouldnâ€™t understand it, and would likely see it as booing the team that won – especially in the instance of last night when the winning team was on the road.
It never gets old watching Bettman try to hide the sheer terror he feels when surrounded by a arena full of fans that hate his guts.
It seemed as though the consensus Monday night was that Chicago goalie Corey Crawford should receive the Conn Smythe, but that it would likely go to Pat Kane. Naturally, because hockey fans are smarter than the average fan, they were right.
Itâ€™s not that Kane wasnâ€™t entirely worthy of the award, but Crawford deserved a good look, too. One theory could deal with the media, and how much it exploited Crawfordâ€™s glove hand side being weaker, and thus targeted by the opposition during the playoffs.
Just a thought, but Crawford definitely deserved the Smythe in my opinion.
Speaking of goalies that didnâ€™t win something, now former Flyer goalie Ilya Bryzgalov had trouble winning anything this season.
Tuesday morning, the Flyers announced they would use their last remaining buyout this season on the, shall we say, mentally intriguing Bryzgalov. Buyouts are granted to teams under the new Collective Bargaining Agreement. Philadelphia already used its first, and only other buyout on Danny Briere last week.
Itâ€™s obvious the Flyers will never figure anything out between the pipes, so the only real question is where Bryzgalov goes from here. Does any team in the NHL actually take a chance on him? Who would be crazy enough? Calgary might be an option if Miikka Kiprusoff retires, as has been hinted at. But if youâ€™re the Flames, and are vested in rebuilding the franchise, taking a chance on Bryz is a tough call.
The KHL sounds like a good place for this bear-in-the-woods-fearing loon.
John Tortorella, eh?
The Vancouver Canucks officially announced hiring John Tortorella as their new head coach Tuesday.
In 13 seasons of coaching in the NHL, Torts accumulated a record of 410-340-67 (as well as 37 ties from the pre-lockout era).
But taking on a head coaching job in Canada is a whole different animal for the former Lightning and Ranger coach.
For one, the media will hate him as much as he hates the media. Second, and perhaps more importantly, in Canada, Tortorella will need to learn to scowl in both a Canadian accent AND in French.
Iâ€™ve been trying to get into Vine, the social media application that allows you to stitch together various mini videos.
Andrew Ference has it figured out, though.
After the Bruins lost Monday night, the veteran defenseman took to Vine to shave his playoff beard.
Now that is how you use social media!
And the 2014 winner is…
The Penguins were selected as favorites to win the 2014 Stanley Cup by Bovada, a gambling odds maker, with 13/2 odds.
And to this, I say, â€œMeh. Who cares?â€ Thereâ€™s a lot more that goes into winning a championship than being the favorite team. Believe us, Bovada, Penguins fans know.
Well that will do it for this weekâ€™s edition, be sure to check back throughout the summer for more. Until next time, happy hating!